Fear had taken hold of me one Saturday morning, as I attended the emergency clinic at the Doctor’s surgery.
One night, some weeks earlier I had experienced what I thought was the onset of a heart attack, which had resulted in Gillian calling for the emergency Doctor.
I lay on our couch that night, shaking and perspiring as the Doctor did a thorough examination and gave me his verdict.
He told me that I was having a panic attack, brought on by stress. This was all new to me, and after he had gone, it was life back to normal again…or so I thought.
We were in our first few years of married life and I was just 30 years old.
A few days later, I was driving and experienced the same symptoms all over again; it then escalated with me being scared to be in crowded room, as I was afraid that the same thing would happen in public.
Heart palpitations started to occur every night as I put my head on the pillow.
I honestly felt that I would never break free, and so decided after yet again feeling unwell, that I would attend the surgery on that Saturday morning, driven by one of my leaders.
There were just three of us waiting for a consultation and I nervously waited my turn, when all of a sudden I heard the voice of the Holy Spirit say these words… “What are you doing here, man of God?”
I was shocked and almost wondered if anyone else heard it, but obviously not, so I simply stood to my feet and walked out, without saying a word to anyone.
As I walked back to the car, nothing had changed, but everything had changed. God had spoken.
His voice was so clear that I knew that He was telling me to get out of there. I knew there and then that I was looking in the wrong place for my healing and that my problems weren’t physical at all, but in fact were brought about by anxiety and fear.
I told the Devil that day in no uncertain terms that if I were to die, I would be going straight to Heaven anyway, so he could no longer bind me with fear, as either way he would lose…I was on the winning side.
I never did go back, and lying in bed one night some weeks later, I realised that the palpitations had ceased and I was healed.
As I recall my story today, I know that someone else will be experiencing what I had gone through all those years ago.
Fear is such a powerful force that it is literally able to form your future, if you’ll let it.
Remember that fear stands for False Evidence Appearing Real.
Today, be strong and walk out on your fear – tell it that you are no longer in a relationship with it.
Be set free.
1 John 4:18 ‘There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear…’
A daily devotion for a better way of living.